Sherry: Do you think she's a vegan?
Me: Why would you say that?
Sherry: Because she's skinny and she drives a Prius....
God I LOVE stereotyping!!
Saturday, October 01, 2011
Friday, September 30, 2011
Close but still too far
My coworker on her newly panty hose covered legs, "Look, I have Twilight legs....you know cuz they look like vampire skin..."
Me, "Try more like Golden Girls legs."
Me, "Try more like Golden Girls legs."
Thursday, September 29, 2011
To my lovely coworker...
"You really need to tone down the perfume...the backroom is really starting to smell like Whore."
Why a Safe Word is an excellant idea
How about Bandmaster....
CITY, Iowa -- An Iowa City woman has been charged with misdemeanor domestic abuse, accused of hitting her boyfriend because he wouldn't have sex with her.
Police were sent to the house late Monday night after a report about a female out of control.
Her boyfriend told officers that Melissa Minarsich had struck him a few times and ripped a storm door off the house.
He said she became enraged when he refused to have sex.
Police said Minarsich told officers that her boyfriend's account was accurate.
Officers report that Minarsich's speech was slurred and she smelled of alcohol.
A public phone listing for Minarsich could not be found. Online court records don't list the name of her attorney.
Read more: http://www.ketv.com/news/29326845/detail.html#ixzz1ZMF0qB8S
CITY, Iowa -- An Iowa City woman has been charged with misdemeanor domestic abuse, accused of hitting her boyfriend because he wouldn't have sex with her.
Police were sent to the house late Monday night after a report about a female out of control.
Her boyfriend told officers that Melissa Minarsich had struck him a few times and ripped a storm door off the house.
He said she became enraged when he refused to have sex.
Police said Minarsich told officers that her boyfriend's account was accurate.
Officers report that Minarsich's speech was slurred and she smelled of alcohol.
A public phone listing for Minarsich could not be found. Online court records don't list the name of her attorney.
Read more: http://www.ketv.com/news/29326845/detail.html#ixzz1ZMF0qB8S
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Inventory
Homeless looking man with a briefcase picking through half smoked cigarette butts from the public ashtray outside my work...it's like a kid in a candy store.
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
prickly blessings
I'm officially unwillingly growing a go-tee on my chin...yet another wonderful detail of pregnancy.
No title needed
So I come and go here as I please apparently....Gonna try and get back to my blogging roots.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Did that just happen?
Okay, so again I went absent for months with not a shred of decency to stop by and see that people ACTUALLY started reading my inane banter. And yes, actual real people not robots of the dark internet blog world, actual people.
I think I just felt a swift kick in the ass to make this little thing my baby again....
Soo where am I?
Well I fell of the weightloss wagon over the holidays and put on about 20 lbs which put me at around 280 lbs...ermm okay more like 286 but I like to round down! So feeling like shit I finally stepped it into gear about 3 months ago and I'm sitting at 255 lbs as of this morning. Which is a grand total of 106 pounds since January of 2009. Watch out people cuz this is only the beginning, I have alot more to lose and I plan on bitching about sore muscles and gross old people I see at the gym!
Aside from weightloss I am also a culinary student at Metro Community College's Institute for the Culinary Arts here in Omaha, NE. I know, I know....fat girl going to school for food? Are yer CRAZY? Probably but I love to cook and I love to let my creativity and passion flow through food.
This semester marks the beginning of the actual culinary courses which is uber exciting for me! In my Orientation course we have to create a blog and use it as a portal for homework assignments, so this blog will be moonlighting as a sassy culinary review blog. I have to review a book, a few restaurants, document through pictures and instructional blogging a meal that I cook at home, so it should be interesting.
I don't like to get cheesy, but at one point this blog was theraputic for me, it helped me get my feelings out at a really difficult, dark time in my life and somewhere along the way it healed some old wounds and then I nonchalantly pushed it aside for quite sometime. Still, I've never been able to delete it, its a safety blanket in alot of ways for me. Plus I can make fun of stupid people whenever I want!
So, I'm gonna give it another go, and see what pointless verbal diarrhea I can come up with.
Cheers!
I think I just felt a swift kick in the ass to make this little thing my baby again....
Soo where am I?
Well I fell of the weightloss wagon over the holidays and put on about 20 lbs which put me at around 280 lbs...ermm okay more like 286 but I like to round down! So feeling like shit I finally stepped it into gear about 3 months ago and I'm sitting at 255 lbs as of this morning. Which is a grand total of 106 pounds since January of 2009. Watch out people cuz this is only the beginning, I have alot more to lose and I plan on bitching about sore muscles and gross old people I see at the gym!
Aside from weightloss I am also a culinary student at Metro Community College's Institute for the Culinary Arts here in Omaha, NE. I know, I know....fat girl going to school for food? Are yer CRAZY? Probably but I love to cook and I love to let my creativity and passion flow through food.
This semester marks the beginning of the actual culinary courses which is uber exciting for me! In my Orientation course we have to create a blog and use it as a portal for homework assignments, so this blog will be moonlighting as a sassy culinary review blog. I have to review a book, a few restaurants, document through pictures and instructional blogging a meal that I cook at home, so it should be interesting.
I don't like to get cheesy, but at one point this blog was theraputic for me, it helped me get my feelings out at a really difficult, dark time in my life and somewhere along the way it healed some old wounds and then I nonchalantly pushed it aside for quite sometime. Still, I've never been able to delete it, its a safety blanket in alot of ways for me. Plus I can make fun of stupid people whenever I want!
So, I'm gonna give it another go, and see what pointless verbal diarrhea I can come up with.
Cheers!
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Week....400??
Yeah...I've been abscent for awhile...so long that I filled the void with losing 100 lbs. Abso-fuckin-lutely!! I weigh in now at 261 lbs.
Monday, February 02, 2009
Weigh In: Week 4
This week was a good one. It was filled with positive choices and lacked temptations. I went out to dinner, ate at a friends house and even forgot my meal for work one night...and I managed to make smart choices and get through it.
So what is the dreaded number at this week??
So what is the dreaded number at this week??
342.4
One thing in particular that I've noticed myself watching out for is my fat intake. I've never paid much attention to the fat grams...only calories and sodium...and sometimes carb. But a friend ofmine is on a diet as well and her doctor told her no more then 25 grams of fat a day. Out of curiousity I started to look at what I was consuming and I can really see a difference in what I eat. You just don't realize how much fat is in ALMOST everything.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Phlegm..Party of one?
So thank God for the Zpack! I started feeling better the next day once on that.
I felt great this week, but now I'm losing my voice again, and I feel like I have a tumor the size of a golf ball imbedded in the back of my throat. That can't be a good sign.
The diet is going great! Last night I went out to eat with Steph. We went to Hector's at 5pm and waited for what seemed like 3 hours so that we could just sit and spoon the yummy salsa into our mouthes. Yes, it's THAT good!
We both behaved ourselves...erm considering we are BOTH on diets (right, Miss I crave gas station burgers when awake in the morning). We shared one basket of chips with lots of delicious fresh salsa. For dinner I had a taco salad with grilled chicken. When asked what they offer for fat free or low fat dressing the skinny bitch that possibly graduated in my class says that they only have fat free Italian. IF I WANTED ITALIAN DRESSING I WOULD BE AT OLIVE GARDEN...I ended up getting some regular ranch on the side, but didn't even end up using it. The salsa was so good I just used more of that for dressing. I ate about half of the salad then tossed the rest. Water to drink!
I was proud of myself. It's a relief to know that I'm at the stage in my diet where I don't consider myself a binge risk. Nothing worse then having to ask your best friend if she would be willing to throw herself in between me and a slice of cheesecake... if it came to that. I'm pretty sure she would, but also pretty sure that she would refrain from being seen in public with me afterwards.
No one said it was easy to be a good friend!!
I felt great this week, but now I'm losing my voice again, and I feel like I have a tumor the size of a golf ball imbedded in the back of my throat. That can't be a good sign.
The diet is going great! Last night I went out to eat with Steph. We went to Hector's at 5pm and waited for what seemed like 3 hours so that we could just sit and spoon the yummy salsa into our mouthes. Yes, it's THAT good!
We both behaved ourselves...erm considering we are BOTH on diets (right, Miss I crave gas station burgers when awake in the morning). We shared one basket of chips with lots of delicious fresh salsa. For dinner I had a taco salad with grilled chicken. When asked what they offer for fat free or low fat dressing the skinny bitch that possibly graduated in my class says that they only have fat free Italian. IF I WANTED ITALIAN DRESSING I WOULD BE AT OLIVE GARDEN...I ended up getting some regular ranch on the side, but didn't even end up using it. The salsa was so good I just used more of that for dressing. I ate about half of the salad then tossed the rest. Water to drink!
I was proud of myself. It's a relief to know that I'm at the stage in my diet where I don't consider myself a binge risk. Nothing worse then having to ask your best friend if she would be willing to throw herself in between me and a slice of cheesecake... if it came to that. I'm pretty sure she would, but also pretty sure that she would refrain from being seen in public with me afterwards.
No one said it was easy to be a good friend!!
Monday, January 26, 2009
Weigh In: Week 3
So I'm a bit disappointed with how little I lost this week...
346.4
I know even a little loss is a good loss and if I look back at the week and ponder where it could have gone wrong...The fact that I was on my death bed for 3 days with a sinus infection could have a little something to do with it. I sucked on a lot of cough drops in those 3 days. But I didn't eat anything that I normally wouldn't on my diet...in fact I barely ate anything because I felt like shit. So that really throws me for a loop.
I know I need to pick up the pace on the exercising. I also know that I am using this crazy work schedule that they have me on for the next month as an excuse for not going to the gym. Shame on me.
I am determined to shine this week!!!!!!
Wish me luck!!
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Of Course!
The is an unwelcome feeling in the back of my throat.. My guess is strep, let's hope I'm wrong.
FUCK!
FUCK!
Monday, January 19, 2009
Video Moment
I don't know what's better; Matt's impersonation or David Letterman's laugh!! I love them both!
Weigh In: Week 2
Today marks week 2 of my diet.
Let me start by saying that I am OFFICIALLY on a diet. I've made it through the first week of hell. It wasn't so bad, it's just alot to get used to. As they say; old habits die hard. I was always one of those people that ate out of bordom. So at home I always sat and ate snacks at the computer, while at work I would munch on fried deli food. I've had to find other ways to fill that void. It's pretty easy at home to do, because I'm not home all that much. I'm pulling 60 hour work weeks from now until God only knows when because my boss is having back surgery today. Out of her whole staff she trusts me and the assistant manager...
Which leaves me with the void at work. This past week was difficult, but I keep reminding myself that if I eat that burrito, it's going to make a home for itself on my ass and I will have to work 3 times as hard to get it to pack up and leave. I keep myself busy with cleaning and organizing the store...not just to take my mind of food but also to try to make up for the fact that I'm not exercising as much as I should because I'm pulling so many hours. I try and stay at a fast pace to work up a sweat...plus I constantly find myself doing butt crunches...despite the fact that I know customers think I'm try to pass a monster fart discretely.
Now the fun part.
I weighed myself first thing this morning...erm, after I went to the bathroom and I'm happy to say that I weigh in at [insert drum roll]:
Let me start by saying that I am OFFICIALLY on a diet. I've made it through the first week of hell. It wasn't so bad, it's just alot to get used to. As they say; old habits die hard. I was always one of those people that ate out of bordom. So at home I always sat and ate snacks at the computer, while at work I would munch on fried deli food. I've had to find other ways to fill that void. It's pretty easy at home to do, because I'm not home all that much. I'm pulling 60 hour work weeks from now until God only knows when because my boss is having back surgery today. Out of her whole staff she trusts me and the assistant manager...
Which leaves me with the void at work. This past week was difficult, but I keep reminding myself that if I eat that burrito, it's going to make a home for itself on my ass and I will have to work 3 times as hard to get it to pack up and leave. I keep myself busy with cleaning and organizing the store...not just to take my mind of food but also to try to make up for the fact that I'm not exercising as much as I should because I'm pulling so many hours. I try and stay at a fast pace to work up a sweat...plus I constantly find myself doing butt crunches...despite the fact that I know customers think I'm try to pass a monster fart discretely.
Now the fun part.
I weighed myself first thing this morning...erm, after I went to the bathroom and I'm happy to say that I weigh in at [insert drum roll]:
348.6
The hole to China
The pot hole in the middle of the parking lot at my work is about ready to swollow the building whole... I'm starting to worry...I thiink it has a plan, because everyday it gets bigger and bigger...
World domination??
World domination??
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Fiber Overdose
They should have a limit on how many fiber one yogurts one should eat in a day. I think I surpassed it. I'm feeling quite odd right now.
Guess who's lost 6 lbs??? ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Guess who's lost 6 lbs??? ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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